1. Which unit will be better this year? Texas' offense or defense.
Anwar: I am not ready to sell Todd Orlando’s defense short right now. Orlando has switched several players around to put them in a position to succeed. Texas linebacker Malik Jefferson could emerge into the Big 12’s best linebacker in Orlando’s system, while Chris Nelson and Malcolm Roach could have a huge impact up front. Greg Ward grabbed the headlines at Houston, but that defense punished Oklahoma and Louisville. Besides, I am not sure what this offense looks like if Chris Warren sustains an injury this season.
Alex: I’ve said it and said it and said it. The talent gap personnel-wise from offense to defense is not great enough to expect a Tom Herman offense in the Big 12 to play second fiddle to a Big 12 defense. To me it almost seems ridiculous. This is a league that scores points and the reason Herman is here is to 1) instill a championship culture and 1a) establish a deadly offense.
2. If you were to walk through Alex's neighborhood, would you dare walk on Alex's lawn. I understand that is an issue for his neighbors....
Anwar: I don’t walk on other’s people’s lawns. I walk on the sidewalk or the street. To me, stepping on somebody’s lawn is a sign of disrespect.
Alex: I’d walk on my own lawn, so that’s my answer to the question, but good luck walking on it if you are a passer-by. I have a corner lot on the east side with no sidewalk in front of my house, so precautions (terrain and landscape-wise) have been taken with cactus and agaves, etc. to completely block any “shortcuts” through even an inch of my yard in the general places people would think of walking or cutting through. If you let your dog stop and crap on the side of my lawn, that’s fine as long as you pick it up, but if you leave it there, I will report you to the police and send an email to the neighborhood list-serve identifying you and your animal as miscreants.
3. Who's hotter? Amy Adams or Isla Fisher.
Anwar: Last week, Alex tried to say Halle Berry was hotter than Beyonce because of that scene in Monster’s Ball. Well, Fisher had her hot moments in Wedding Crashers. Fisher for the win.
Alex: 1) I had to look up these women to see who they are and they both look exactly the same, it is a very tough call. 2) I go with the one who’s not the Wedding Crashers girl because I’ve seen what she acts like when she has to act like someone who is bat-shit crazy and it is not good. If you can act that crazy, you probably have a little of that genuine crazy in you.
4. Green or red salsa?
Anwar: Whenever I see green salsa, I always wonder what is going on here. I never known what to expect. Give me salsa that I can look at and know if it is going to burn my mouth or have less spice than apple sauce.
Alex: Anyone is a donkey who doesn’t like both, it’s like saying you’ll only drink red wine or you’ll only eat a green apple or something. Peppers come in all different colors, shapes and varieties and their flesh is what makes the color of the salsa, but other factors like spices, amount of garlic, lime, cilantro, whatever … those are the things that make the salsa unique. I love both. In any life-situation where I’m asked to choose between the two, I just give the pro answer and say “both.”
5. If Tom Herman becomes the second coming of Darrell Royal, or better, at Texas, what one single attribute as a man, or as a coach, is it that, you think, most enables him to get there.
Anwar: Herman’s attention to detail is what will separate him for the rest. This is a guy who is active in every area of his department. Not only is Herman leading the face-lift in the athletic facility, making sure his coaches tweet, plus has a say in the meals players are served, I get the feeling he knows what brand of toilet tissue is in the bathrooms. I cannot foresee Herman getting out-coached in a game, or him making fundamental coaching mistakes. The way Herman applies his intelligence is something Texas fans will recognize and appreciate.
Alex: Coach Herman’s intelligence is why he’ll be successful. He’s a big-picture guy who has a forest-through-the-trees vision for the program and a plan for executing it while also having an optimizer’s mind at the lower levels as the man in charge of the offense. Being able to be both the effective rainmaker AND the optimizer in an organization’s leadership structure takes immense intelligence.
6. What would you do if your neighbor was caught on camera stealing your wives underwear?
Anwar: If I caught him in my house, I will call the cops … after I unloaded every bullet from my 9mm glock pistol into that pervert’s body. If he was bold enough to break into my home, there is no telling what he might do while caught in the act of a crime. If you break into my home, I have the right to break apart your body with bullets.
Alex: I’d just call the cops. If I caught him in the act, I’d either slice him with a machete, tase him or shoot him depending on what was closest.
7. Topic: GRITS; Sugar / Butter OR Salt / Butter
Anwar: If you aren’t putting hot sauce on your grits, you are doing it wrong.
Alex: I say sugar if cheese grits is not an option. As I’m eating disgusting slop, I might as well try to make it taste like cream of wheat or something. Maybe with sugar and butter? Grits are, by far, the most overrated side dish in all of America. People swear by them as a comfort food and never in my life, never once have grits lived up to the hype or even tasted like much more than baby food.
8. Would you rather die by drowning or being on fire?
Anwar: Drowning seems like such a hard way to go. I know fire sounds extreme, but I’m guessing my nerve endings will burn off and I won’t feel a thing. It could take three to four minutes to die from drowning. That is too much thinking time.
Alex: What have waterboarding shown us? That humans will go to extreme lengths (for obvious reasons) not to let water enter their lungs. It’s why it makes an excellent means for torture and gaining confessions. Neither option here is pleasant. However, once you do give in and have to take water into your lungs, the experience in the brain is generally said by scientists to actually be a pretty soothing way to die.
9. If you and Alex were playing on the same team ⚾️. Who would be the pitcher and who would be the and catcher?
Alex: I see what you did there, not answering
Anwar:
10. You can only have one for the rest of your life: burgers or tacos
Anwar: If you are saying I have to eat Whataburger, Mighty Fine Burger, P. Terry’s, Hat Creek Burger Company and burgers from Top Notch Restaurant for the rest of my life, sign me up right now.
Alex: You would be a lunatic and a fool to select hamburgers. There is one hamburger/cheeseburger product that can only be differentiated by toppings, etc. When I choose “tacos” I have access to traditional crunchy tacos, soft tacos with all different kinds of tortillas, shells etc. along with access to all proteins (fish tacos, pork belly tacos, breakfast tacos, etc.) If I were gluten-free or vegan I could use a lettuce wrap and still call them tacos. I could have any kind of taco I wanted and the number of combinations and possibilities is endless.
11. Hunting or Fishing?
Anwar: Honestly, my Southern roots are coming out right now in the column. Fishing is cool, and deep sea fishing can be fun, but you are not living life until somebody cooks you a well-seasoned venison. However, do not ask me to take a bite of the heart after a kill.
Alex: I am a sportsman and a GIANT supporter of both angling and hunting endeavors and species management processes. While I am not an experienced hunter, I hope to be one one day and I appreciate both our American hunters and our fishermen for basically bankrolling America’s management and protection of our wildlife with their permits, fees and equipment excise taxes. That said, I’m a fisherman at heart, a salt-water fisherman that will one day wake up just to spend day after day on my kayak going after reds once I retire. You take away my fishing, you take away my dreams.
12. Who wins a 35 man battle royal between the current and all former US presidents, all while in their prime years? No holds barred.
Anwar: Lincoln was 6-foot-4, 180 pounds, and some historians said he wrestled over 300 times and had only one loss. He was also known as a trash-talker. He is also quoted as saying, “Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the axe.” Lincoln works Teddy.
Alex: Please, that old man with wooden teeth stands no chance against the Teddy Roosevelt. He was a boxer in college who used to “throw down” with military aides in actual fights. He actually got blinded in one eye in a fight and kept going. Tough son of a bitch. He also knew jiu-jitsu.
13. Should ESPN have more politics in their content? And if they do, what will the impact be?
Anwar: Hard to understand ESPN right now. The network announced it does not mind political commentary, but demoted Sage Steele. I am liberal who expresses my views to friends, family, and I support organizations I believe in. However, Steele should not have been demoted, even if I do not agree with her viewpoint.
Alex: No, people look to sports as a respite from political divisiveness. For many, it is a true topic of refuge. This is why, despite being outspoken (sometimes possibly to a fault) on other issues, I have never once made a partisan political statement, tweet, post, column, word or sentence. If there is an issue with even the mildest partisan political tint to it, I’m very careful about what I say so as not to appear to be someone who my readers/listeners/viewers, etc. disagree with politically especially in these times when people are on genuine tilt. I think ESPN and its talent would be wise to do the same.
14. Randy Moss vs Deion Sanders...who you got? Why?
Anwar: Moss was long, athletic and impossible to cover. I love Deion in his prime, but there is no way he could shutdown Moss on a consistent basis.
Alex: Deion is the kind of player who many think of as the greatest player at his position in history. No one believes this about Moss. I believe that in his prime, Deion gave anyone trouble, even including Moss even though Moss was bigger and beastlier. Late in Deion’s career I can almost picture Moss even getting open on him, but in his prime I’ll take the Deion-side of the matchup. He, at a time, had a closing speed and smooth burst in coverage that would even work against the tallest receivers who could separate with length.
15. Which QB's that were drafted within a year or two of each other will be HOF inductees? Rothlisberger, E. Manning, Romo, Rivers.
Anwar: Alex and I agree on Big Ben and Manning (he is getting in with two Super Bowl rings), but seemingly disagree about Tony Romo (FYI: he was not drafted). Look, Romo is doing what smart players who want to be in the Hall of Fame have done - get a TV job after retiring. When former players get TV jobs, they start hanging around the media and become friends with voters. If you do not think that has an impact, explain with Terrell Davis is in the Hall of Fame, but Warrick Dunn is not. Is Kurt Warner really a Hall of Famer? Romo may not get in on the first ballot, but his stats will be hard to ignore, especially as a media member.
Alex: Big Ben and maybe Eli Manning. The voters take championships into great consideration as Anwar most certainly knows and Romo has a horrible postseason history that is different from that of a Marino, et al. because he was largely considered in many cases to have crapped the bed in key moments, memorably costing his team victories.
