Michael Lewis, the author of such classic books as Moneyball, The Blind Side and The Big Short, blew me away with an observation he made about grief on the Smartless podcast (of all places).
Lewis lost his 19-year-old daughter Dixie to a car crash last May. On the podcast, he was talking about how he was trying to figure out why he was so exhausted in the weeks and months after her death when he finally stumbled upon the answer.
Lewis came to the realization that his mind had created an assumed future for his daughter and it was working overtime creating a new reality without her.
“I was taking for granted a future without even thinking about what that future was and now I had to rewrite, my brain had to rewrite that reality without a living Dixie Lewis in it,” said Lewis. “It was busy doing that, on one track, like humming in the background all of the time.”
My first thoughts upon hearing this was to go to the times I’ve dealt with grief in my personal life.
We all have assumptions about our lives that sometimes end up not being true. For example, most of us as kids we all assume we’re going to grow up, get married and have kids. The reality is that isn’t true for everyone.
My second thoughts, and I’m not trying to make light of grief, were about the Texas Longhorn baseball team.
Connecting this year’s UT baseball season with grief shouldn’t be that big of a stretch. After all, we had just come off a very disappointing weekend against Kansas State. It may have even been my first thought if I had listened to the podcast last night after watching Air Force come into town and bomb the Horns.
All season long I’ve documented Texas’ chase for a top-8 seed and a guarantee to host the super regional should the Horns make it that far. Now, it’s looking more and more likely that a top-8 seed is not realistic.
It’s time for our brains to start working on a new reality that does not include UT as one of the top teams in the country.
Is it too late for Texas to turn it around? Obviously not. But time is running out.
The Horns have one more game against Air Force and then Baylor (20-17) comes to town.
The Bears are a sub .500 team in conference so on paper Texas should win. But can we really assume that anymore?
Baylor doesn’t particularly hit very well with only one player (2B/SS Tre Richardson) hitting above .300. Right Fielder Kyle Nevin has the biggest bat with seven home runs on the season. In short, this is a team that won’t hurt you at the plate…IF the Texas pitching can get even close to what they were in February.
Tyler Thomas has been the Bears’ best pitcher. The lefty comes into the series sporting a 1.97 ERA and 50 k’s over 50 innings pitched.
Kobe Andrade is another arm that you shouldn’t take lightly. The Sophomore transfer from Texas A&M picked up the Big XII Newcomer of the Week award after pitching a complete game against Kansas last week, only giving up two runs.
Again, this is a series that Texas needs to sweep if it has any hope of righting the ship in conference play.
But at this point, it is hard to assume the Longhorns are anything more than what they’ve been since the start of March – basically a .500 team.
It’s enough to make you grieve.
RANDOM THOUGHTS ON UT BASEBALL:
I don’t even know what to make of the pitching. First we saw Tristan Stevens devolve into a pitcher who gets yanked in the first inning not once but twice. Then we see Pete Hansen nosedive in Manhattan last week. And now the staff just gave up 14 runs to an Air Force team that isn’t all that good.
Having said that, count me in the group that wants to see more of Redshirt Freshman Lebarron Johnson. The big righty out of Florida has some serious pop. If he can maximize his potential he has a chance to be special. Of course that’s a very big if.
It’s entirely possible that I’m a jinx. Just last week I heaped praise on Austin Todd, only to see him turn around and go 0-7 to start the K-State series. He followed that up with an 0-5 performance last night dropping his average to .290.
Eric Kennedy and Ivan Melendez being back in the lineup is HUGE for this team. Kennedy sets the table better than anyone else on the team while Melendez is the best at sweeping the table clean. Seriously, the Hispanic Titanic is having a career year. As someone who used to live in El Paso – I’m loving watching him play. He has brought a lot of pride to the border.
Bryce Elder’s second start for the Atlanta Braves was a bit rockier than his magical debut. The former Longhorn gave up two runs, three hits, and five walks in 4 1/3 innings in a losing effort last Sunday. However, he was able to limit some of the damage from loading the bases each of his first two innings. The future is still bright for Elder.
FROM HORSEHIDE TO PIGSKIN:
I, like most of you, am really looking forward to Saturday’s Spring Game. But there is a cold reality associated with the football team as well. We’re probably going to come out of this weekend with very few of our questions truly answered.
Will either of the quarterbacks establish himself as the sure fire starter? Not likely. Neither Hudson Card nor Quinn Ewers has been able to separate through the first 13 practices, what makes anyone think they’ll be able to do it on the 15th practice of the spring? Both have received praise throughout the spring and it has been pointed out that both still have flaws. I expect we’ll see some good and some bad from both on Saturday.
What will it mean if the offensive line is as bad as it's been made out to be all spring? Not a lot. We all suspect that one, possible two of this fall’s starting five still aren’t on campus. How can you judge a unit when 40% of its starters aren’t here yet? Not to mention the lack of depth among the players already on campus. So brace yourself to see some really bad o-line play this weekend – but try not to let it get you down because it isn’t necessarily a predictor of things to come.
How about the defense? Are you really going to get excited if those guys pick up a sack or two against this offensive line? Or, even worse, what if it doesn't get ANY sacks against this offensive line? Will it be time to turn into Chicken Little proclaiming the sky is falling? What if Texas lands Ochaun Mathis? The TCU grad transfer has already proven that he is more capable of rushing the quarterback than just about the entire Texas d-line combined. By the way, how freakin’ cool was it that Mathis’ mom appeared on last week’s Modcast? That has to be a first of some kind.
AGIYE HALL MISGIVINGS:
Finally, Agiye Hall transferring to Texas will undoubtedly make Texas’ Wide Receiver group much stronger. After all, Nick Saban himself once described Hall as “one of the most explosive players on this team.”
Texas could certainly use some explosive plays.
But I come into the Agiye Hall experience skeptical.
I really enjoyed Ketch’s 10 Thoughts from the Weekend column Monday. I would love to have a time machine just to go back in time and see a young Ketchum’s face as the football field went up in flames.
But while I am impressed with his ability to grow as an adult, I am not as convinced as he is that Texas is the right place for Hall to get his second chance.
Don’t get me wrong, nothing I have read about Hall makes me think he’s a bad kid. It seems to me that the problems he has encountered have more to do with maturity issues. And who among us was all that mature at that age? So I don’t think my issues are really with Hall himself and more just wondering if Texas is the right place for him to go through the growing process?
Saban couldn’t trust Hall on a team full of competitors to do the right thing. He hinted that Hall wasn’t where he was supposed to be when he was supposed to be there. And there are reports (unconfirmed by me) that it was the Alabama players themselves that voted Hall off the team.
Will the Texas players be able to help Hall grow when the Alabama players couldn’t? Didn’t we just go through a week of internet consternation over the comments from Moro Ojomo that perhaps not every guy on the team is doing what it takes to make himself and his team better? How will Hall fit into that kind of culture?
Don’t get me wrong, I am all for second chances. As a Christian, where would I be without God’s grace? I just think there may be better places for Hall to get that chance.
Of course, I’ve been wrong before and I’ll be wrong again in the future so it’s very likely I’m wrong about this too. So take everything I’ve said with the proverbial “grade of slaw.”
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