OT: Letter To Your Spouse And Kids As A Last Message After You Kick The Bucket...

[The Sundance Kid]

I came across this idea years ago.

I am curious how many OB's have written a "last words" letter to your family should you kick the bucket before they do?

I wrote them today, one to my wife (from Nam) and one to my kids. I'm not sick or dying, at least I hope not, but I'm going on a long trip this summer and just in case, I thought it would be good to give them instructions on where to find important information and some last words from me. I don't remember where I got the idea from, but I had written one to my wife a few years ago when I was traveling abroad, so I updated hers and wrote one for my kids, they are in our safe deposit box.

I basically gave them some instructions on who to contact for our estate plan and where they can find all of the stuff they need to settle our estate, then some encouraging words about them, etc. and yes, I even told them one last Dad joke to hopefully make them laugh.

Anyway, it feels good to know that I can tell them for one last time how much I love them and that they will be ok after I take a dirt nap, hopefully a long time from now.

I would have loved to have a letter from my parents. So, I thought I'd share this idea with OB.

Hook'em!

 

[wabhorn]

“Letters from Dad” is a program that incorporates this process!

 

[UTDB]

I lost my wife unexpectedly over a year ago with no opportunity for a goodbye and guidance for myself and kids on how to live without her. I support what you have just done wholeheartedly. I can’t put in words how much a letter like that would have mean to me and our family. I not only Have to live without her companionship and love, there are so many questions I have that can never be be answered. I have a letter for my kids and grandkids but it is too late for one from the love of my life

 

[lifeisgoodtoday]

I came across this idea years ago.

I am curious how many OB's have written a "last words" letter to your family should you kick the bucket before they do?

I wrote them today, one to my wife (from Nam) and one to my kids. I'm not sick or dying, at least I hope not, but I'm going on a long trip this summer and just in case, I thought it would be good to give them instructions on where to find important information and some last words from me. I don't remember where I got the idea from, but I had written one to my wife a few years ago when I was traveling abroad, so I updated hers and wrote one for my kids, they are in our safe deposit box.

I basically gave them some instructions on who to contact for our estate plan and where they can find all of the stuff they need to settle our estate, then some encouraging words about them, etc. and yes, I even told them one last Dad joke to hopefully make them laugh.

Anyway, it feels good to know that I can tell them for one last time how much I love them and that they will be ok after I take a dirt nap, hopefully a long time from now.

I would have loved to have a letter from my parents. So, I thought I'd share this idea with OB.

Hook'em!

Thanks OP. Just put this on my "this weeks" to do list.

 

[The Sundance Kid]

I lost my wife unexpectedly over a year ago with no opportunity for a goodbye and guidance for myself and kids on how to live without her. I support what you have just done wholeheartedly. I can’t put in words how much a letter like that would have mean to me and our family. I not only Have to live without her companionship and love, there are so many questions I have that can never be be answered. I have a letter for my kids and grandkids but it is too late for one from the love of my life

😞 So sorry to hear about the loss of your wife, can't imagine that. Glad to hear though that you had the same idea for your kids and grandkids. Wish you the best.

 

[The Bostitch]

You keeping that info from your wife until death just in case there's a change of mind?

 

[The Sundance Kid]

You keeping that info from your wife until death just in case there's a change of mind?

LOL, she doesn't know about it, but she could easily find it in the safe deposit box. I have a note on the outside envelope to not open it until I'm taking a dirt nap.

 

[Edmond Dontes]

If your safe deposit box is at a local bank or credit union you should check the rules of access.

The two credit unions I worked at the box could not be accessed after the primary renter passed without letters of testamentary and executorship letter. We ran into several issues when a spouse needed in the box to get the will.

 

[HookEmHorns11]

As an estate planning lawyer you sound on top of the game. I have my financial advisors, and banks, identified in my Last Will and Testament no less.

 

[pflugerhorn90]

My FIL died last year and left letters for everyone including detailed information on his estate, funeral plans, accounts etc. It was incredibly helpful.

 

[Comb]

I came across this idea years ago.

I am curious how many OB's have written a "last words" letter to your family should you kick the bucket before they do?

I wrote them today, one to my wife (from Nam) and one to my kids. I'm not sick or dying, at least I hope not, but I'm going on a long trip this summer and just in case, I thought it would be good to give them instructions on where to find important information and some last words from me. I don't remember where I got the idea from, but I had written one to my wife a few years ago when I was traveling abroad, so I updated hers and wrote one for my kids, they are in our safe deposit box.

I basically gave them some instructions on who to contact for our estate plan and where they can find all of the stuff they need to settle our estate, then some encouraging words about them, etc. and yes, I even told them one last Dad joke to hopefully make them laugh.

Anyway, it feels good to know that I can tell them for one last time how much I love them and that they will be ok after I take a dirt nap, hopefully a long time from now.

I would have loved to have a letter from my parents. So, I thought I'd share this idea with OB.

Hook'em!

Great idea.

thanks for posting.

 

[MikeCorleone]

I had a case several years ago where a woman sent a big package to her brother far away about a year before she died of cancer.

She told him only to open if there was a dispute regarding her estate. Boy howdy, was there. The kids hired me and it turned out the hubby (second) had been abusing her and lying about how he was worth hundreds of millions. It was like something from a TV show.

 

[WoodlandsHorn]

I travelled a lot for work, so started doing this at about age 45. It’s pretty easy to update every year or so.

it’s mostly estate and financial stuff, so I sit down with my wife and make sure she understands it and answer any questions.

I do like the idea of having a separate letter that is more personal and only opened after death. Thanks for the idea!

 

[Royal Soil]

I came across this idea years ago.

I am curious how many OB's have written a "last words" letter to your family should you kick the bucket before they do?

I wrote them today, one to my wife (from Nam) and one to my kids. I'm not sick or dying, at least I hope not, but I'm going on a long trip this summer and just in case, I thought it would be good to give them instructions on where to find important information and some last words from me. I don't remember where I got the idea from, but I had written one to my wife a few years ago when I was traveling abroad, so I updated hers and wrote one for my kids, they are in our safe deposit box.

I basically gave them some instructions on who to contact for our estate plan and where they can find all of the stuff they need to settle our estate, then some encouraging words about them, etc. and yes, I even told them one last Dad joke to hopefully make them laugh.

Anyway, it feels good to know that I can tell them for one last time how much I love them and that they will be ok after I take a dirt nap, hopefully a long time from now.

I would have loved to have a letter from my parents. So, I thought I'd share this idea with OB.

Hook'em!

Great idea and I have done this. Better yet, leave them a video.

 

[GilmerHorn]

I lost my wife unexpectedly over a year ago with no opportunity for a goodbye and guidance for myself and kids on how to live without her. I support what you have just done wholeheartedly. I can’t put in words how much a letter like that would have mean to me and our family. I not only Have to live without her companionship and love, there are so many questions I have that can never be be answered. I have a letter for my kids and grandkids but it is too late for one from the love of my life

I’m sorry.

 

[The Sundance Kid]

Great idea and I have done this. Better yet, leave them a video.

I thought about doing this as well, with Zoom, it's very easy to make your own video and save it in an MP3 or maybe it's MP4 format. You could put this on a flash drive and leave it in the safety deposit box as well. Thanks for the reminder.

 

[echeese]

I lost my wife unexpectedly over a year ago with no opportunity for a goodbye and guidance for myself and kids on how to live without her. I support what you have just done wholeheartedly. I can’t put in words how much a letter like that would have mean to me and our family. I not only Have to live without her companionship and love, there are so many questions I have that can never be be answered. I have a letter for my kids and grandkids but it is too late for one from the love of my life

i am truly sorry to read that

wish i had the words

 

[The Sundance Kid]

If your safe deposit box is at a local bank or credit union you should check the rules of access.

The two credit unions I worked at the box could not be accessed after the primary renter passed without letters of testamentary and executorship letter. We ran into several issues when a spouse needed in the box to get the will.

Good advice. Found out today at my bank that all of the people who have access to our safety deposit box have to be present in order to add anyone else to the access of it. I have me, my wife (from Nam), and my youngest son, but I need to add my oldest son and daughter (from Nam) as well.