So I’m minding my own business with a 3 a.m. Trash raid. Snagged half a pizza and what I think was a sock.
Then Duke—the unhinged house chihuahua —comes screaming out and jumps me. I noped up a tree so fast gave myself tree burn. Bros were already up there pretending they weren’t just licking taco wrappers.
My mom shows up, hits the brakes at 40 feet, gives her usual “I swear, if you touch my kids” stare. Meanwhile, the human’s outside in wet pajama pants holding bear spray and what I assume is a loud metal stick of overcompensation. We chilled in the tree, then hit the bird feeder gym set. Old human kept mumbling to himself and wouldn’t stop taking pictures of us. Hope he gets the help he needs as we will return tonight.
Then Duke—the unhinged house chihuahua —comes screaming out and jumps me. I noped up a tree so fast gave myself tree burn. Bros were already up there pretending they weren’t just licking taco wrappers.
My mom shows up, hits the brakes at 40 feet, gives her usual “I swear, if you touch my kids” stare. Meanwhile, the human’s outside in wet pajama pants holding bear spray and what I assume is a loud metal stick of overcompensation. We chilled in the tree, then hit the bird feeder gym set. Old human kept mumbling to himself and wouldn’t stop taking pictures of us. Hope he gets the help he needs as we will return tonight.
