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OT: Bathroom question

clob94

clob94

Well-Known Member
Aug 25, 2014
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Has anyone ever taken such a gratifying poo that you actually get goose bumps while doing it?





Totally not football related obviously, but I was just curious if I'm the only person this has ever happened to. My little brothers comment was "dude, you're weird".
One of my business partners said "Jesus man, what did you eat?"
One of my other bus partners said "........how long had you been holding it?"
My general practitioner said "I'm at work. Call your proctologist" and hung up. D!ck move.

Thoughts?
 
I think i have maybe 5 posts ever on this board. I lurk all day everyday. But THIS post gets me to log in and post. There is something to be said about a full release of a huge BM. I like just knowing I'm fully empty. Thanks for making me post!

HA! this is my first POST! Member since '09!
 
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andrew86e said:
I think i have maybe 5 posts ever on this board. I lurk all day everyday. But THIS post gets me to log in and post. There is something to be said about a full release of a huge BM. I like just knowing I'm fully empty. Thanks for making me post!

HA! this is my first POST! Member since '09!
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Holy sh!t....... thanks for joining our discussion! It's always nice to have new voices come in here and unload their thoughts. I'm sure it's a relief for you after abstaining for so long. Perhaps this experience will help you wipe away any anxieties you have about sharing thoughts with us in the future!
 
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andrew86e said:
I think i have maybe 5 posts ever on this board. I lurk all day everyday. But THIS post gets me to log in and post. There is something to be said about a full release of a huge BM. I like just knowing I'm fully empty. Thanks for making me post!

HA! this is my first POST! Member since '09!
Click to expand...
Welcome aboard, hoss
 
Ya'll buncha shit inspectors? Here I sit all brokenhearted could shit but only farted gang huh?

Hook'em
 
clob94 said:
Holy sh!t....... thanks for joining our discussion! It's always nice to have new voices come in here and unload their thoughts. I'm sure it's a relief for you after abstaining for so long. Perhaps this experience will help you wipe away any anxieties you have about sharing thoughts with us in the future!
Click to expand...
I see what you did there...
 
Yeah, as you get older, that sensation can increase, I think. Definitely with wees.

Jim Gaffigan has a bit about this. Love Gaffigan.
rGFYHR


This conversation made me leave for 5 minutes . . . I feel so much better now!
 
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andrew86e said:
I think i have maybe 5 posts ever on this board. I lurk all day everyday. But THIS post gets me to log in and post. There is something to be said about a full release of a huge BM. I like just knowing I'm fully empty. Thanks for making me post!

HA! this is my first POST! Member since '09!
Click to expand...
You said log.

If I ever have a nice trip like that I always have the opening riffs to an 80's Robert Plant tune find their way into my head.

Also...Gaffigan is awesome.
 
I was on a business trip to Dallas 15 or so years back. A group of us were at dinner at an upscale restaurant after 3 or 4 days of exhaustive meetings. I excused myself prior to the food being served and went to the men's room.

Well what I produced in that bathroom should be banned and made illegal! Never in my life had something like that come out of my back side . . . and it hasn't again since that night.

The smell was beyond horrendous. It even made me gag. I'm not sure what combination of foods led to that smell but I've never reproduced it, thank god. Complete strangers commented on the smell when entering the bathroom and then would immediately leave. Even minutes later after I had returned to the table, grown ass men would walk into that bathroom and immediately walk out.

I don't know about goose bumps but I still lol when I think about that night. But I never want to experience it again.
 
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I had to drop in a post. The thread title was just floating there, waiting for me to plop right in. Probably best to squirt right out now.
 
That's one of the few things in life that get better the older you get.

Just had my 68th birthday and a good dump is one of the best things that happened.
 
ekal48 said:
That's one of the few things in life that get better the older you get.

Just had my 68th birthday and a good dump is one of the best things that happened.
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So what you're saying is, with age comes wisdom, gray hair, grandkids and an appreciation of quality throne time?


The porcelain is strong with this one.
 
Full disclosure:

For years I've been very particular about my fecal activities. I refuse to drop deuce in public places. Restaurants, gas stations, bars, airports-- all off limits to me. There's just nasty muh fuggas in this world and my arse sharing a spot that a possible nasty arse has occupied just doesn't sit well with me (I made a pun).
Along with that, I don't just use toilet paper. I love me some baby wipes. Aloe is my wipe of choice. I know what you're thinking-- "dude, you're a MAN! You should be able to wipe your a$$ with tree bark!". And yes, I can and have--- BUTT, I just love me some baby wipes. Case in point-

ONE of my buddies was giving me sh!t about using baby wipes so I broke it down for him:

Him- you really wipe your a$$ with baby wipes?
Me- look dude, if you were playing in the yard with your kid, and you fell down and your hand landed in your dog's sh!t, would you clean it off with a paper towel?
H- hell no. I'd wash it off...
M- well dummy, baby wipes wash your a$$ off. Duh!

It wasn't until I this last may that I actually sh!t in a public place. After I left africa, I had an 8 hour layover in Paris. I went into the crapper- I was dying- and low and behold, their crappers are in a self contained room. Not stalls, an actual "sh!t closet". You shut the door and it's pitch black until you turn the light on. It's quiet as hell. The crapper smelled like pinesol. It was immaculate. I ran out of the crapper and down to the nearest airport store and bought me some wet wipes. Upon my return, I carefully chose my closet and wrecked shop. It was cathartic.
When I finished my poo, I triple baby wiped, got up and walked out. There stood a bathroom attendant who almost bowled me over to come in behind me and clean the toilet I had just abused.

Memo to you guys, it's ok to sh!t at Charles De'Gaul airport.
 
After once having to spray my dysentery into a rancid Nepali squat toilet every 10 minutes for 72 hours, it's a rare sh*tter that fazes me these days.

(But I will armor up the seats of any public crapper with plenty of toilet paper.)

toilet-6.jpg
 
BringBackRoyal said:
After once having to spray my dysentery into a rancid Nepali squat toilet every 10 minutes for 72 hours, it's a rare sh*tter that fazes me these days.

(But I will armor up the seats of any public crapper with plenty of toilet paper.)

toilet-6.jpg
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Bbr----

Tell me you're joking.....
 
They have the same squat spots in Quatar & Kuwait. The first time a walked in one I thought the pot had been removed. Nope, the other 2 stalls were the same.

Side note, if you ever see a low water trough in the bathroom in any islamic country DO NOT rely on our Texas knowledge and piss in it. Apparently, they wash their feet after using the mens room and don't take kindly to infidels pissing in their wash water.
 
GuaranteedFresh! said:
They have the same squat spots in Quatar & Kuwait. The first time a walked in one I thought the pot had been removed. Nope, the other 2 stalls were the same.

Side note, if you ever see a low water trough in the bathroom in any islamic country DO NOT rely on our Texas knowledge and piss in it. Apparently, they wash their feet after using the mens room and don't take kindly to infidels pissing in their wash water.
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What's the penalty? Do they cut off your peen?
 
Clob good choice on the wipes that's all I use and my co workers have caught on after i bought some for myself at work. Always keep them close.
 
K2C Sooner said:
Meanwhile, at clob's house...............HA!

Sure.jpg
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It's a condo. I don't have pets and hate mowing lawns.

And btw, I use Hanebisho toilet paper bro- along with my Aloe baby wipes. I learned a long time ago that you can fix your nose, you can fix your teeth, you can fix your eye sight- but God only gave you one butt hole. Treat it with love and respect.
 
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clob94 said:
It's a condo. I don't have pets and hate mowing lawns.

And btw, I use Hanebisho toilet paper bro- along with my Aloe baby wipes. I learned a long time ago that you can fix your nose, you can fix your teeth, you can fix your eye sight- but God only gave you one butt hole. Treat it with love and respect.
Click to expand...


No problem Clob. I was just joking. I learned a long time ago not to argue with former football players. I once got into an argument with Dante Jones, our former great LB on an OU board. I thought we were having fun, but the mod banned me. I always have respect for former players, ALL College Football Players Matter!
 
Funny. No argument here man. Just realize that a man's starfish is, to me, a holy place. And mine is especially important me. I had hemorrhoids in college a few times from squats, stress etc- and I started taking better care of my sphincter after that. Nothing, and I mean nothing, is more uncomfortable than a burning butt hole. This is why I've never been a big fan of poop shooting chicks I've dated. Ya it's tabu. Ya it's kinky. Butt, in the end, would you want some 6'4 dude Roger ramjetting his meat phallus into your balloon knot for an hour? Seriously? I have colleagues that are gay men and I Josh them about it from time to time. They respond "yes but I'm 6'2 and sturdy. You date those pocket barbies that can't handle it....".

I respect the bung hole.
 
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